It is an engrossing proposition for the sheer lunacy of it: converting something built for one purpose into a different role on a ridiculously tight time frame. And hoping like hell that it works.
The coaching staff at the Central Coast Mariners might look at that scene and see some stark similarities to what they were handed when Usain Bolt arrived at the Central Coast.
Could they turn the world’s greatest athlete into a footballer, good enough for the A-League, in a matter of weeks?
We know now that they could not. But my goodness, how they tried.
When Bolt arrived at the Mariners, the joke was on the club. By the time it was over, some of the biggest names in the game reckoned he should have been given a contract.
If nothing else, what a remarkable effort to get a 32-year-old Jamaican with no football experience to within a hair’s breath of the starting line. Mariners coach Mike Mulvey and his assistant Nick Montgomery, who both put huge amounts of work into Bolt, oversaw a remarkable level of development.
But in an ironic twist, it was Mulvey’s aggressive plan to re-shape the club that cost Bolt in the end.
Mulvey arrived in Gosford with a crystal clear vision of how to transform the team from laughing stock to legitimate. Their opening two games, against much-vaunted opponents, have shown exactly that.
The Bolt experiment, given to him by owner Mike Charlesworth, could have derailed the mission completely. But while Mulvey and Montgomery did all they could to teach Bolt how to play, they never took their eye off the bigger picture - perhaps best demonstrated by the stunning signing of Ross McCormack, several weeks after Bolt arrived.
In any event, the ex-Brisbane coach noted that he would have difficulty this season in placating all of his strikers for game time, ones already ahead of Bolt in the pecking order.
In the end, the only way Bolt was going to get game time was if the contract he signed stipulated he had to play. But this was never on the table.
The tipping point for both parties came on that fateful night in Campbelltown Stadium last month. History will record that Bolt scored twice against a state league-level composite team and the footage went viral around the world. It was an extraordinary evening - and one everyone should remember fondly.
But from that moment on, club and player saw the situation differently. Convinced he’d done enough, Bolt was expecting a bumper offer. That night, he bounced into his Audi Q3 like he’d claimed another gold medal.
On the contrary, the Mariners saw he wasn’t ready to influence the game in the manner they hoped. If he was going to play in the A-League, he needed to bully defenders of this calibre. But they largely played around him.
The Mariners’ hierarchy realised they’d landed in an awkward spot. Having seen only the highlights, the whole world, minus the football purists, urged them to sign him.
But it was never that simple. The commercial elements of the proposed deal were simply too great a risk for a club who needed, more than anything else, to focus on winning again.
And nobody was prepared to underwrite the risk. Not the club. Not the FFA. Not Fox Sports. Not the sponsors. Not his agent. Not Bolt himself. Everyone talked it up so long as somebody else was footing the bill - and, if it didn’t work out, the blame.
There were some queries about Bolt’s commitment. He missed training more than once and his excuses weren’t ideal. The club didn’t berate their star triallist but they noted it all the same.
The club urged Bolt to increase his endurance - emphasising the aerobic and anaerobic difference of sprinting fitness to football fitness - but he found that conversion as difficult as learning the technical side of the game.
Still, it can’t be denied that he improved out of sight in his period with the club. And he could really let fly with his left boot.
Bolt may yet make it as a footballer, just not at this level. The A-League is one of the world’s top 20 leagues - so he may want to think about dropping to the next tier. Better players than him have failed to make it in Australia.
The experiment winds to a close today and many will be split on whether it was all worth it.
For me, I say this: nothing ventured, nothing gained. It wasn’t perfect, but the Mariners attracted worldwide publicity they’ll probably never have again. And Bolt did make serious progress towards the end goal.
But the club got out at the right time. It couldn’t go on. Given the past five years, they’ve got too much on the line to be continually fumbling around with gimmicks.
And that label - irrespective of the two goals that accompanied it - is probably how this experiment will largely be remembered.
